Most guys have no clue what to say in that awkward moment after “hi.”
There’s silence.
Pressure.
And usually . . . they default into question after question, hoping something clicks. But that interview mode kills attraction.
In my latest video, I show you exactly what to do instead:
https://youtu.be/7F7f75UspvE?si=6IuTiO4dKeCdrldq
Here’s the fix: every time you ask a biographical or informational question, you need to follow it with either a tease or value.
For example:
Bad: “Where are you from?” — “Oh, cool.”
Better: “Where are you from?” — “Ohhh, that explains everything.” (tease)
Or: “Where are you from?” — “I love that city, the food there is insane.” (value)
The goal is to move away from Q&A and toward emotionally engaging conversation.
Questions aren’t bad—they just need a purpose.
Use them to dig up something to tease or riff on. That’s how you make the conversation fun and flirty instead of dry and transactional.
Also, remember this: introducing yourself is a subtle way of saying “this interaction is going somewhere.”
It’s socially acceptable, but it sets the tone that you’re not just strangers passing by.
Now, should she be talking more? Yes . . . if she’s talking about the right things. There are four conversation zones:
- She’s talking about good topics — great, let her go.
- She’s talking about boring stuff — worst case, take the wheel.
- You’re talking about boring stuff — not ideal, but you can pivot.
- You’re talking about good stuff — this is your safest, most effective zone.
So the key is to lead.
Offer value.
Tease.
Guide the conversation toward something man-to-woman, emotionally relevant, and interesting.
Because boring kills attraction. And interviews never turn into dates.
—Todd V
